b intheair: RAT KILLERS

Thursday, September 08, 2005

RAT KILLERS

THE BLACK BOX OF DEATH-This box has a food tray full of wonderful DECON which is to make your red blood cells rupture and make them bleed to death-the only problem with that, is he may leave and we won't know if we kill'em or not. If you see the tape on the floor, this is where a shitter used to sit. The smell permeates up through the floor. This is torture because you have the shit smell continuously thoughout the office. It doesn't matter how often you brush your teeth you always smell SHIT.
Now this baby we nicknamed the THUMPER-it about snapped 2-3 fingers off Erik's hand-hey buddy you might be able to get a Purple Heart for that one
KILLER OF MICE-Now come, this is ridiculous. At best this is only going to piss the rat off. Now instead of running away and playing games with the Colonel, he's liable to jump off the file cabinet and start chewing on his neck. I'd hate to come in and see the Colonel laying on the floor because he had the shit scared out of him and he ran into the wall trying to get away. I have this vision of coming in the office and see the Colonel laying on the floor with a rat standing on his chest with an Iraqi flag saying is this all you have for me. Come on, you can do better than this you dumb SOB.
STICKY PAPER-come-on, the only thing this damn paper is going to do is be a mild annoyance and again just piss him off (like gum on a shoe). At most this will pull some hair out or rip some skin off. As for hair, who give a rats ass. EXACTLY, that is just what I want, a rats ass on a platter. Dammit, I want to see results, dead rat carcuss in a pile. You know what they say, if theirs one, theirs 20. In the days to come, I'll post a picture if were successful. Maybe Erik and I'll perform an autopsy. OK were bored.

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